Happy 5th of July!!

Congratulations, Unless you blew your hand off with a bottle rocket, it was a pretty good day for America. Personally I am just glad my father was too drunk to beat me tonight.... I should backtrack. My father Hardly ever beats me, only on the fourth of July....
In 1988, I accidentally told him that the Founding fathers could "lick my hairless pre-pubescent yam bag for all I cared", he went crazy, he was yelling, jizzing, pooping and peeing.
Now, if he is sober enough, he beats me to remind me that some things can't be taken back, like seceding from England and making fun of the founding fathers. But this year he did not because he was too drunk, and for that I am thankful.